Second Pregnancy vs First Pregnancy

It's no surprise, there are huge differences between your first pregnancy, and your second. I can't speak for third or fourth pregnancies, but hopefully I will be able to one day. As for now, I will share my experience so far the second time around.

Time.

It's goes by so much faster, with distractions, working, having a toddler to look after, and being pre-occupied most of the time; days, weeks, and months are just flying right by. There wasn't an hour that would go by in my first pregnancy that I wouldn't stop and think about this new baby coming into our life. Even-so, time didn't quite go as fast with the first pregnancy. Once Clara came, and I was able to experience first hand how quickly their first year goes by, it goes without saying that time just goes much too fast. With this second baby, I find myself having to remember what week I'm in, and now that I'm starting to feel this little one kick here and there, I have brief moments thinking (oh yeah, I'm pregnant). Sure enough, we're almost half way. Less than two weeks until we find out what this little one will be. Do children make life go by faster? Of course, we literally do watch time move by in our lives. Everyday they're learning something new, growing a little more, and before we know it, they're off starting their own life.

Effort.


Having gone through it all already, we get the timeline now. We understand that this new baby likely won't need a nursery set up until about two or four months after it's born. We see that buying baby items now is a little unnecessary as the baby will likely only need mama's milk, diapers, and sleep for the first month of it's life. With our first, the nursery was done by the time I hit 12 weeks. We started buying baby items here and there, and I would go into panic whenever I went into the nursery, knowing that we had so much more to buy, and so little time. Yet, none of it was needed. Like I said before, that baby just needs it's mama...

So the nursery hasn't been set up. Yes, we've looked at ideas for this new baby. We have a brief timeline of when we'd like to have Claras new room done, our new room done, and then baby's room done, but the "stress" of it all is non-existent this time around. Funny how quickly it all changes.

The gender reveal this time around will be more intimate than last time. This time Jesse will find out, and he will reveal to me privately what we're having... It makes me so emotional knowing that he'll have those first moments knowing what is growing inside of me. What Jesus has planned for our family, and what Clara will be forever friends with. Then, shortly after, we will share the news with family, and finally we will share the news with our friends.

Energy.

Or lack there of. I think the duration of this pregnancy (October - July), and where I live (Canada) makes a pregnancy that starts in the Fall and ends early summer... almost impossible to work out, out side, for at least the first 5 months of pregnancy. Therefore, my activity level, diet, and energy have been the worst they've ever been. My first pregnancy was from January - September. By the time I was out of those first 12 weeks, fatigue (goodness does it ever hit me hard) was long gone, and out I was everyday either walking to work, running, doing stairs, eating great because spring was just around the corner and with no holidays really in sight... I was in the best shape and enjoying myself doing it all too!

This time around. Yikes. Just no comparison. Not only has fatigue hit me harder, but also having a toddler hasn't been easy. Thankfully it has now subsided, and we're only a month away until the snow starts to leave. Hopefully I can jump back on that activity train and get my diet back in order.


Body.


Yup. For certain this body remembers it's held a baby before. It didn't take long for this bump to "pop" out and say hello. Everything's a little more "stretched", "loose", ... but oh so beautiful. I could never understand why I couldn't just embrace loving my body, and my bump when I was pregnant with Clara. This time around however, I have a whole new level of appreciation for what my body is doing. Having seen what my body is capable of doing, I have a new found appreciation this time around.



Emotions. 

Stronger. I think now that I've been through this all before, I'm no longer afraid. I'm no longer worried. There isn't this constant fear of losing this baby. There isn't this unknown question of what labour will be like, or those first few weeks with a newborn. Nursing, changing diapers, lack of sleep. It's all just second nature now. Which makes me feel so much more comfortable with being a mama to my sweet babies. I remember so vividly, 4 AM, sitting on the kitchen floor, just 2 days after Clara was born. Sobbing. Uncontrollably. The fear, the anxiety, the post-partum, the tiredness, it was all just so overwhelming. Of course, I have the most wonderful, and involved parter I could ever ask for. I have the most loving in-laws, and some really amazing friends... but at that moment I felt so alone, so vulnerable, knowing that this tiny little human depended on a mama, who just had no idea on what she was doing. Yet, somehow, here we are ... 16 months later. I've learned so much about myself, how to love more, what it feels to have someone fully depend on you, and seeing TRULY how Jesus sees & loves us... goodness what an experience.

and now, here we are... getting ready to do it all over again.

Love. 

Your heart grows. In case you haven't seen The Grinch, you probably should. Clearly the evidence is there, the heart certainly does grow, and boy are we ever experiencing it now. It's a feeling that you can't explain until you've experienced it first hand. Seeing the excitement from Jesse, our friends and family, and even watching Clara becoming this nurturing little love bug... the love is exponential.

Sadness. 


and of course. This time around, and for all our future babies... my mom won't be here to experience any of these milestones with me. We didn't have the kind of mother daughter relationship that Clara and I have built in just our 16 months together. We probably never would have, but having her "somewhat" there during my pregnancy, and experiencing Clara's birth and the short time she was present for part of her life... it was special, and I will forever cherish it.





Signed,

simplelifewife
16w6d no.2